Well, it’s safe to say that this year didn’t go as anyone planned. With the onset of the Covid-19 pandemic in the United States in mid-March, all our lives got turned upside down. And that includes the sex positive community. No more sex parties. No more casual sex. Really, barely any dating!
But the flip side is also true. We saw communities get creative about connecting in new, safe, intimate ways. We heard from multiple health departments (including our own!) that masturbation was not only okay but actually the best way to get off. We saw people taking care of their bodies and the bodies of their loved ones.
It’s been hard. And it’s not over. But it’s always worth it to find those tiny silver linings, even on the darkest storm cloud. So with that in mind, treat yourself to our Yearly Rewind: 2020, starting with our top posts of the year. They’ll make you laugh, think, and maybe even get you ready to take on 2021. Maybe.
Top 5 Sexual+Being Posts Of 2020
1. The Quarantine Self-Pleasure Plan (Or How to Masturbate When You Have Roommates)
“First things first — wash y’all hands, bruh! Y’all know you should be doing this anyway (and should have been *side eye*) but especially now that most of us are almost always in close proximity to others, and many times sharing spaces and items, keep those grabbers clean!”
2. What Do Herpes And Coronavirus Have In Common?
“But despite years of serving the community of people living with HSV, what I wasn’t prepared for was a pandemic that would upend the entire globe and present so many triggering parallels to living with herpes and herpes stigma.”
3. Too Many T.I.’s: Policing Female Sexuality with Black Masculinity
“Damn, Clifford. Yeah, that’s right. Clifford. When somebody acts out the way T.I. was acting about his daughter, Deyjah’s, virginity back in November 2019, we have to address him with the government name. Clifford. Damn, damn, damn.”
4. “Own Your Fantasy (Suite)” 5 Lessons in Love and Lust from Reality TV
“While I’m not a citizen of Bachelor Nation, I’ve seen enough seasons to know the formula: Girl or guy meets dozens of potential suitors. Courtship begins. Alcohol flows. They have sex like once in some sort of suite? And, boom, marriage!”
5. Why HIV/AIDS Disproportionately Affects Black Women – and How to Fix That
“One such organization pushing the conversation around HIV/AIDs to be more intersectional and inclusive is the Sankofa Collaborative, a national network of African-American and Afro-Latino health professionals and researchers. At their annual A Paradigm Shift conferences, presenters tackle everything from Black women and historical trauma to transgender health equity to action plans for the future, and more.”
Top 5 Sex Positive Moments of 2020
From excellent television to a lot of masturbation to the hit of the summer, 2020 managed to keep it sex positive despite the many challenges.
January: Sex Positive TV on Netflix and Hulu
“Netflix Sex Education Season 2 was released … And it was excellent. Netflix’ Sex Education continues to be a place where a range of sexualities, ages, and genders are celebrated in a sex positive way. Season 2 brings the cringe, the laughs, the sexy — and gorgeous cinematography. Don’t miss it.
Sorry/not sorry to give you two TV shows in a row, but it’s not our fault two incredibly sex positive shows were released in January! While Season 1 of Shrill was all about lead character Annie finding the strength to get what she wanted — in both work and romance — Season 2 is about her building on that strength. Also! So many sex scenes, starring Aidy Bryant in her (proudly) fat body. Hell. Yes. We’re here for it.”
February: Dwayne Wade and Gabrielle Union Support Their Trans Daughter
“We talked before about how beautiful it was when Dwayne Wade and Gabrielle Union publicly supported their child’s trans identity. Now, Zaya has officially come out as a trans girl and her parents are continuing to stand behind her, even introducing to her to the world in a video she filmed herself. Wade says that they’re letting Zaya lead the way and teach them how to be allies. *Sigh* We’re in love.”
April: NYC Health Department Gets Explicit
“We’re old enough to remember when the Surgeon General was fired for recommending that young people masturbate, so it was especially exciting this month to see both the NYC and DC health departments talk about masturbation as a safe sex practice and rimming as unsafe during the COVID-19 pandemic. We’re all about openness and honesty around sex practices, especially when it comes from the government!”
May: Everyone Is Talking About Masturbation
“People are talking more openly about masturbation! As communities across the world shifted to social distancing, we’ve seen an uptick in open conversations about masturbation. It appears that when the safest sex is solo sex (and everyone is doing it), this long-stigmatized sex act is finally coming out of the shadows!”
July: WAP.
‘Nuff said.